Making Friends With Our Feelings

Our feelings exist on a spectrum. From the major highs of joy and elation, to the lows of loss and grief- it can sometimes be hard to remain grounded during each of our unique emotional experiences. Of course, this is a natural part of being human. Yet, it is still important that we learn how to honor each feeling as it arises. 

When we suppress and swallow our feelings, we aren't allowing our nervous system to process these experiences- meaning that we may be doing more harm than good. We may feel like pushing down our feelings serves us in the present moment, because it means that we don’t have to deal with the difficult or uncomfortable emotion, but when we do this, we only prolong the process of acceptance, and moving forward. Processing our emotions is vital. It is the healthy way to respond to having feelings. We are not always taught how to process our feelings in a healthy way,  and that makes it our responsibility to learn. 

This process doesn’t have to be scary, and we can approach it as if we are learning how to make friends with each and every feeling that comes to us. 

Making friends with our feelings begins by understanding that we no longer need to judge any of our feelings as either ‘good’ or ‘bad.’ Our feelings are just feelings, and when we release the need to judge or label them- we begin the journey to setting ourselves free. This process can be helped by allowing yourself to step into the role of ‘observer.’ Consider your feelings as a flowing waterfall, when we are standing in the flow of the waterfall, it feels overwhelming, confusing, and hard to see the full truth of the situation. Now, consider yourself standing behind this flowing waterfall, observing the flow of your feelings without being totally immersed in them. From this place, you can sit with your feelings, listen to what they bring you, tend to them with compassionate care, and honor the experience for what it is. 

Honoring your feelings takes practice, and it also doesn't mean that every emotion should be gracefully and quietly observed. Observation is the first step, allowing ourselves to feel is the next. Emotions ask to be felt- it is their essence. We must let ourselves feel the sacred rage, the joy, the grief- in order to process it, and then let it go. Observing and honoring our emotions means that we can respond rather than react. If your feelings of anger ask you to scream, then scream. If your sadness wishes to be felt through the flow of tears, then cry and know that you are healing. If your joy wants to dance and sing, then share this light that your feelings bring. 

Making friends with your feelings can begin right now. Check in with yourself, ask ‘what do I need to feel supported? What is this emotion asking of me?’ Respond with courage and love. 

Be open, feel deeply, and honor this never ending flow of life as it moves through you.