Within each of us, our inner child lives eternally. Depending on our upbringing and past, we will all have a different relationship to our inner children. Those who have gone through childhood abuses and traumas may feel disconnected from this part of themselves due to a lack of love. Others may enjoy a beautiful and nurturing relationship with their inner children.
Regardless of your past and the current relationship you have with this part of yourself, there are ways that we can reconnect, re-parent, and love our inner child.
When we ignore our inner child, we ignore a necessary part of ourselves that hugely impacts the way we experience and act in the world. A neglected inner child may show itself through immature actions, self sabotage, lack of self love, and an inability to uphold boundaries. When this happens, your inner child is simply looking for attention, validation, and love- just as they did in childhood. On the other hand, a healthy and loved inner child can show up as playful, accepting, trusting, and creative.
If you’re like me, you may be starting this journey from a severely traumatized place, where your inner child was ignored, abandoned, and unloved- perhaps in a way that mirrors the difficulties you experienced in childhood.
There is hope for all of us, just as there was for me.
I found healing when I approached my inner child in the same way that I would a real child.
When you visualize your younger self standing in front of you, listening to every word you are speaking and every thought you are thinking, it becomes a lot more difficult to criticize yourself with negativity or self hatred, because you realize that your inner child is worth so much more.
Approach your inner child as a parent and ask them what they need in order to feel loved, seen, and heard. Give them what they never got in childhood- this is where the deepest healing will take place.
We have the power to re-parent ourselves in the way that we truly needed and wished for as children. Be patient with your inner child, as they are growing and learning too. Be kind to them, as they are seeking this validation from you. Most of all, be loving, and hold them when they are hurting- rather than ignoring or pushing them away. Feel their pains and comfort them with words of love, safety, and healing. Let your inner child know that their feelings are valid, and that they have always been enough.
Cultivating this connection with your inner child is some of the most important and powerful work you will ever do. Be brave and embrace your younger self, for they are waiting for you.
You deserve to be loved- fully, wholly, and completely.
Begin by pouring love into all parts of yourself that are seeking this, and your world will begin to radically transform.